How do you entertain if you are Decadent Vapours, purveyor of fine, eclectic vape flavours? You throw a dinner party – with a difference.
The setting: Craig-Y-Nos Castle, on the edge of Fforest Fawr in South Wales.
The invitation: an opportunity to take vape taste testing to the next level, in a true fine dining environment.
On a golden autumn evening, the guests, impeccable in tuxes or frocks, saunter into the conservatory. The view of the Welsh countryside is splendid, but the real treats are to come, as ‘Mick’ the Butler enters bearing a tray with some most unusual aperitifs.
This is a vaping ‘dinner party’, and the tray offers a selection of atomisers containing delicious cocktail and soft drinks vapes, including Cherry Kola, Blue Hawaii, Green Giant (Honeydew Melon and Absinthe), Mojito and Pina Colada. For the less exotically-minded, Dandelion & Burdock, Sarsaparilla, Kola, Zingo (lemon, lime and orange) and Red Zip are on offer.
The guests leisurely exchange flavours and savour the ambience, resisting numerous requests to enter the Dining Room, until at the gong’s loud insistence, everyone takes their place.
Awaiting is a grand table with the welcoming glow of candelabras. But in the place of knives and forks are batteries and atomizers. The choice of starter vape is Melon or Maple Hot Wings, a DV savoury favourite known for being a real mouth-waterer as well as an eye-waterer. Main course is Roast Beef, Roast Chicken or Smokey Bacon. Mick glides with silent expertise around the room, ensuring that no guest is ever vapeless.
As other diners look on intrigued from their more conventional evening fare, the vaping diners chat happily to each other. Bong! The Butler interjects, “Orders for desert are now being taken.”
The diners are spoiled for choice. Blackberry Crumble, Crème Anglais, a firm favourite with customers, Lemon Meringue and Banoffee. Or for lovers of all things 70’s around the table, it can only be Black Forest Gateau.
Each guest savours their chosen treat as they relax further in into the evening’s most conducive atmosphere. True to form, one guest requests ‘some of each’. There’s always one.
No dinner party is complete without coffee, and tonight there is a choice of five kinds. Seasoned coffee drinkers order the caffeinated Doppio Espresso, while more reserved palates sample the frothy Cappuccino or the delicate and subtle balance of sweet, creamy Café au Lait. There is even the favourite ‘real’ tipple, Irish coffee.
As Ten o’ Clock strikes, the guests are directed into the drawing room with its sumptuous armchairs. In keeping with tradition, the gents gather around the fireplace; smoking is one habit they have all gladly relinquished, but their satisfied vape clouds fit this atmosphere perfectly.
Mick has reloaded his tray with a selection of fine floral and tobacco flavours and for the first time all evening suddenly announces, “DV is the only company that makes its own tobacco bases. We filter actual tobacco almost to the molecular level. That’s why I think our tobacco vapes are some of the best, if not the best, in the world.” He retreats sheepishly as though he felt his outburst surprised.
After a refined evening of Decadent Vaping, it is time for the guests to climb into their coaches and depart. A vaping dinner party is a great way to lose weight and have a thoroughly fun time – though it must be acknowledged that a few homeward guests take a detour to the building with the golden arches; there are some needs that not even the finest vape can satisfy.
Tel: 01792 773339